Where Am I?

I've ran away from home today!

I'm guest posting over at Single Mom in the South...so check it out!

Sorta Southern Single DysFUNctional Mom??

No, my friends, I have not become suddenly Single, nor have I become "sorta" Southern; I am Southern alllll the way. Southern as sweet tea. Southern as grits.

But when I asked for guest posters and my friend, Sorta Southern Single Mom, offered to help out, I was SO excited! Because I heart her. And she rocks. And you know what else she does?
She.puts.the.fun.in.DysFUNctional.TOO!!!

So check out her post, and then go check out her blog, because she is all kinds of awesome!



Hey Y'all! I am Sorta Southern Single Mom and I usually make my home over at Single Mom in the South , but today, I'm here to steal some of Cyndy's thunder. I've decided I might just be able to challenge her in the competition of most DysFUNctional family. *grins*

I'm just back from a trip to The Great White North were I spent a week crammed into my parents tiny little bungalow with my parents, my two children, my sister and her then fiance as we prepared for their wedding weekend! Growing up, we never had more than 4 people living in the house, so with a big wedding coming up, we thought would be good to try 7...for a whole week. Now, mind you, Daddy did pull the RV up into the side yard and Evie and Jack did sleep out there... you know, sort of National Lampoons Christmas Vacation Style, so that alleviated some of the crowding, but while they did have electric, there was no sewer or water, so we were still working with 1.5 baths.

Can you say DysFUNctional?

Over at my blog, I told the story about my mom and her relationship with her Bathing Suit. It is her clothing item of choice and I now have even more proof!

We arrived late in the evening and after being in the car for 11 hours, let the kids take a bike ride. All seven of us went together with the big people walking behind the kids on their bikes. About a half mile from my parents house, I look over at my mother and realize that she had, in fact, joined us on our walk/ride in her bathing suit. Now, she was wearing a coverup, but it was obviously doing just that: covering up her bathing suit.

At least we were in her neck of the woods and not mine this time!

Fast forward to the next morning. The Girl and my mom were chatting while getting ready for the day. My mom mentions to The Girl that she has to go water the flowers around the corner at the church. Of course, The Girl, for whom I am just the vehicle that provided her with my mother, wants to go, but she is in her pajamas. My mom says (and I quote EXACTLY):

"You have to get dressed first. I usually just wear my bathing suit and put something over it."

The Girl turns to me and says, "Mamma! Where's my bathing suit?"

*Eyes bug out* Now we are trying to turn my child too! Oh NO NO NO!!!

I did get her a suit and a REAL dress to put over it and my mother did put an actual dress over hers, because, you know, you should dress up to go to church and all...

LAWD 'A MERCY!

You just can't make this stuff up!

Cyndy and her crew aren't the only ones that put the FUN in DysFUNctional!

Visit Sorta Southern Single Mom for more Dysfunctional Fun!

Adventures in Alyssaland

Hello, my lovelies! As you may remember if you read my post last week, I ran away from home!

But never fear; I wouldn't leave you without any dysfunctional entertainment.

Today's blogger is Alyssa from Adventures in Alyssaland, who says:

"In many ways I am crazy, my life is crazy. Welcome to Alyssaland. Such a nice place to visit you just might wanna stay."

Y'all may have already guessed, but Dysfunctional Mom does not sideline as a Tiger Mom. I'm not even on the same planet as a Tiger Mom. And organization? Only in the sense of 'organized chaos'. It's not unusual in our house to hear "I know exactly where that is, it's on the floorboard of the car. Crumpled up, passenger side, under the Diet Dr Pepper can."

So, check out this blogger's take on the situation:

I taught 5th and 6th graders a four-day course called “Taking the Stage.” I wrote a blog about it on Adventures in Alyssaland highlighting my exchanges with the tweens in a series of six line scenes. I thought about doing a recap of the revelations I had during and about the occasion; yet that might be overkill. Really, the experience wasn’t remarkable enough to merit two entries. However, now I am writing for a fresh readership on a Mommy Blog.

Big Grin.

On Tiger Mothers…

I am not a mom of any sort; nevertheless if I was I am too lazy to be a Tiger Mother. Moreover, why bother? Growing up I participated in kid things in the summer—swimming, tennis, summer reading program and camps. I graduated from college with honors, got jobs, relocated from the Midwest to California and now I live in my parents’ basement. Imagine how much more upset they would be if all they had believed I was special.

On Showcases…

They performed a skit for the parents at the end of the week. Cultivating creativity I let them craft their own scene. I wanted to apologize to the parents who taking time off from work straining to hear a series of playettes that made as much sense as listening to Jill Zarin snipe at Ramona Singer #teamblonde.

I applaud all adults who rearrange their day for showcases, recitals and the like. Don’t you ever want to pull a Vickie Gunvalson and scream; “I work!” over Coco Puffs?

Attention Deficit Disorder…

Not theirs, mine. I commented about hoping I remembered to bring in my computer wherein they offered to provide a note as I had for them. When I declined their kind proposal they provided equally helpful suggestions.

“You could write a big note on your hand. But it has to be in ink or marker.” Ah, the kids equivalent of a sticky note or text message to yourself.

“Put it right by the door so you see it before you leave the house.” Sadly, I tried that and still forgot it.

Busted.

Or at least bested.

I commend all the motivated Moms and Dads who attend Suzie and Johnny’s events during working hours while trying to make it look like your organizational skills are better than a 5th Grader.

I have a reunion show to watch.

Autism Awareness - Guest Post

I have a guest poster today! Heather from Acting Balanced has written a wonderful post about her family's experience with Autism. April is Autism Awareness Month, and this is my way of helping to raise awareness. Please also visit Heather at her 'home', Acting Balanced.

As a mom, I like to hope that I'm tuned into what is going on with my children, especially when they're with me almost 24/7, so when, at 15 months my older son wasn't yet regularly calling me mama, or saying much of anything at all, I sent an email to a friend of mine whose son has Autism and asked the question... Does this sound like Autism? hoping that she'd say nope, but what she did say was "You have great mommy instincts, if you think there is something going on that isn't quite right, you're probably right, it might be autism or it might be something else, but you are a great mommy and you've noticed something different in your son, so talk to his pediatrician"

It wasn't just the language issue, although that was a big part of it, wasn't the only thing that made me suspicious of Autism - when I was doing online research, I found a list of symptoms and started checking some of them off (Source):

• The child does not respond to his/her name.
• The child cannot explain what he/she wants.
• Language skills or speech are delayed.
• The child doesn't follow directions.
• At times, the child seems to be deaf.
• The child seems to hear sometimes, but not others.
• The child doesn't point or wave bye-bye.
• The child used to say a few words or babble, but now he/she doesn't.
• The child throws intense or violent tantrums.
• The child has odd movement patterns.
• The child is hyperactive, uncooperative, or oppositional.
• The child doesn't know how to play with toys.
• The child doesn't smile when smiled at.
• The child has poor eye contact.
• The child gets "stuck" on things over and over and can't move on to other things.
• The child seems to prefer to play alone.
• The child gets things for him/herself only.
• The child is very independent for his/her age.
• The child does things "early" compared to other children.
• The child seems to be in his/her "own world."
• The child seems to tune people out.
• The child is not interested in other children.
• The child walks on his/her toes.
• The child shows unusual attachments to toys, objects, or schedules (i.e., always holding a string or having to put socks on before pants.)
• Child spends a lot of time lining things up or putting things in a certain order.

Liam was always my loner, preferring not to engage with us very often and only engaging when we were singing or holding him in certain ways. I would take him to play dates where he would ignore the other children and fixate on a toy or activity, and he wouldn't respond to his name regularly.

My pediatrician listened to my story and set me up with early intervention services, but at 18 months, Liam only qualified for speech therapy on their tests, so we went with a diagnosis of speech delay, but Autism was in the back of my mind, especially as his speech wasn't improving with weekly sessions, and I was even noticing regression in his receptive listening skills.

We finally took matters into our own hands and privately sought out a developmental psychologist to do our Autism testing. I remember being nervous, hoping both that she'd tell me that I was crazy on one hand and that we'd get an Autism diagnosis on the other. I know it might sound crazy to want the diagnosis, but it opens up more doors than it closes and it helps us as parents and caregivers to build skills and understand how Liam thinks and feels and interprets the world around him.

While I don't wish Autism on anyone, I do hope that if you have or know a child who displays these signs and symptoms that you also know that there is a world of hope and love out there in the Autism Spectrum Disorder community and the opportunity to get beyond the diagnosis to the little boy or girl you love is in there too!

Liam is now four and a half and attends a full day Partially Integrated Preschool with a fabulous teacher, who guest posted on my blog, www.actingbalanced.com, along with a number of other parents and experts as part of Autism Awareness Month. I would love to have you stop by and check out their stories.

Heather is a never-stay-at-home mom of three children, a teenager, a preschooler and an infant. She's a Canadian from Toronto living in Charleston, SC with her husband and kids and she started her blog, www.actingbalanced.com as a way to keep friends and family in the loop about her life. Acting Balanced has taken on a life of its own and is now an outlet for Heather to share her family with a wider audience, as well as product reviews, giveaways and more!

Whooooo Am I?

While I'm away on our Softball Vacation this week, I'm going to have some guest bloggers.

Now, you've all read posts from guest bloggers before. It's a fun way to meet new bloggers.
But there's something different about the guest posts that you'll see here this week.
You won't know "whoooo" the guest posters are.
You have to figure that out on your own!
They will leave clues as to their identity/blog in the post, and you will have to use your noggin and figure out who they really are.
You may find them in my followers list; they may be a frequent commenter on my blog. They're all winners, of course! They love words & books, like many of us bloggers. They love their miraculous children, both boys and girls...like most of us parent bloggers.
You can always just google them too!
Of course, there's a prize for your efforts. I have put together a prize package. I don't have a picture yet, but it includes a reusable shopping bag, note cards, stationary, and other fun stuff. It's a VERY cute design that will remind you of me, and if you like my new blog design...you'll love it!
In order to win the prize package, you must correctly identify all of the mystery guest bloggers. If more than one person guesses all of them correctly, I'll draw a winner at random.

The contest will end next Wednesday, July 14th. Good luck and have fun!

*ETA* Blogger seems to be eating comments today. I'm still getting them in email though, and hopefully it will be fixed by the time the first "Whooooo Am I"? post appears!