Adventures in Alyssaland

Hello, my lovelies! As you may remember if you read my post last week, I ran away from home!

But never fear; I wouldn't leave you without any dysfunctional entertainment.

Today's blogger is Alyssa from Adventures in Alyssaland, who says:

"In many ways I am crazy, my life is crazy. Welcome to Alyssaland. Such a nice place to visit you just might wanna stay."

Y'all may have already guessed, but Dysfunctional Mom does not sideline as a Tiger Mom. I'm not even on the same planet as a Tiger Mom. And organization? Only in the sense of 'organized chaos'. It's not unusual in our house to hear "I know exactly where that is, it's on the floorboard of the car. Crumpled up, passenger side, under the Diet Dr Pepper can."

So, check out this blogger's take on the situation:

I taught 5th and 6th graders a four-day course called “Taking the Stage.” I wrote a blog about it on Adventures in Alyssaland highlighting my exchanges with the tweens in a series of six line scenes. I thought about doing a recap of the revelations I had during and about the occasion; yet that might be overkill. Really, the experience wasn’t remarkable enough to merit two entries. However, now I am writing for a fresh readership on a Mommy Blog.

Big Grin.

On Tiger Mothers…

I am not a mom of any sort; nevertheless if I was I am too lazy to be a Tiger Mother. Moreover, why bother? Growing up I participated in kid things in the summer—swimming, tennis, summer reading program and camps. I graduated from college with honors, got jobs, relocated from the Midwest to California and now I live in my parents’ basement. Imagine how much more upset they would be if all they had believed I was special.

On Showcases…

They performed a skit for the parents at the end of the week. Cultivating creativity I let them craft their own scene. I wanted to apologize to the parents who taking time off from work straining to hear a series of playettes that made as much sense as listening to Jill Zarin snipe at Ramona Singer #teamblonde.

I applaud all adults who rearrange their day for showcases, recitals and the like. Don’t you ever want to pull a Vickie Gunvalson and scream; “I work!” over Coco Puffs?

Attention Deficit Disorder…

Not theirs, mine. I commented about hoping I remembered to bring in my computer wherein they offered to provide a note as I had for them. When I declined their kind proposal they provided equally helpful suggestions.

“You could write a big note on your hand. But it has to be in ink or marker.” Ah, the kids equivalent of a sticky note or text message to yourself.

“Put it right by the door so you see it before you leave the house.” Sadly, I tried that and still forgot it.

Busted.

Or at least bested.

I commend all the motivated Moms and Dads who attend Suzie and Johnny’s events during working hours while trying to make it look like your organizational skills are better than a 5th Grader.

I have a reunion show to watch.