Dos & Don'ts When Your Loved One is in an ICU

Today I'm participating in Mama's Kat's Writer's Workshop! I was actually already composing this dos and don'ts list, so I was happy to see prompt #4 for this week: A list of dos and don'ts!




As you may already know, I work in an Intensive Care Unit. I have worked here for over 3 years. Part of my job involves interacting with the patient's families, and over the years I've observed a lot. Of course, I hope you never have a loved one in an ICU. Having a loved one in Intensive Care can be very hard on a family, particularly if it's a long stay. But if it does happen, I have a few suggestions that may make it just a little bit easier.

* Do stay overnight when rules permit. Studies have shown that this is very good for the patient. However...
* Do get your rest. Don't wear yourself out. If you need to go home, or to a hotel, go. You're not doing anyone any favors by being a walking zombie, or by getting sick yourself.
* Do ask the front desk clerk if there are local hotels that offer discounts to patient's family members. We have a very long list of hotels in our area who do that. Also, ask if there is a nearby Ronald McDonald House.
* Do learn the rights of the patient and the family. Pay attention to what the nurses and doctors are saying. Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself or your loved one, or to question the nurses or doctors.
* Do respect the rules of the unit.
* Do post pictures/photos/cards on the walls, if allowed. Not only will they cheer the patient up, but they remind staff that this patient is loved and cared for.
* Do decorate the room for the holidays. I just love to see that; it shows that someone truly cares about that patient.
* Do bring Krispy Kreme donuts to the staff. Just kidding! {Sort of.}


* Don't wear yourself out. It bears repeating.
* Don't send flowers. Most ICUs and burn units don't allow them. Send balloons, stuffed animals, etc.
* Don't think the staff is heartless when we laugh & joke. We are very caring individuals. However, this is our job, and if we didn't lighten the mood sometimes, we'd burn out very quickly.
* Don't call and say "I wanna see/speak to my mama." Please say the patient's name. First and last.
* Don't call over and over. This takes away time that the nurse needs to spend caring for your family member. Call once per shift, twice at the most. If there are significant changes, the nurse will call you (or the legal next of kin).
* Don't bring your neighbor's sister's cousin's ex-boyfriend into the ICU to visit. Keep it to close family members. Keep visits of young children short.
* Don't bring in food and eat it in front of a patient who can't eat. That's just rude, people.
* Don't forget the Krispy Kreme donuts. Just kidding! {Sort of.}