I was young and scared. I was not quite 20 years old. After laboring all day and all night, I was told I would need a c-section. I was so frightened; I'd been afraid of having a c-section during my whole pregnancy. But at 1:16 am, Timothy arrived, all 8 lbs. 12 oz. of him, and my life has never been the same.
I never knew how much I could love someone until I gave birth to Tim. I loved him so much, it totally blew me away. It was terrifying and amazing and wonderful, all at the same time. Leaving him with a sitter for the first time was like ripping my heart out. I had to go back to work, but I refused to leave him with a sitter when he was sick, which unfortunately was frequent. He had chronic ear infections and asthma. Before long, I lost my job due to excessive absences. It was the best thing that could've happened, because that's when I became a SAHM. I loved spending every moment of every day with him. He was an amazingly intelligent child. He kept me entertained. His first sentence was when he was one year old: "I got a booger in my eye." He had his own special words for things, many of which we still use today. Once when he was about two years old, he was picking at his older cousin, and I called him an instigator. He immediately replied, "I'm not a instigator, I'm a FLORIDA Gator." He would just say things that would blow our minds! He was so loving as a small child. He would say "I love you." We'd say "I love you too." Then he'd say "I love you all your heart", which was his way of saying "I love you with all my heart". Once he said that in a store, and a lady said "What does HE want?" But he didn't want anything, he just liked to say that.
My song for him was "You are my Sunshine". I sang it to him all the time. And of course, our favorite book was "Love You Forever". One of his favorite things to do was to bring me paper and a pen and ask me to draw him something. He had utmost confidence in my artistic abilities; he thought I could draw absolutely anything. I did get pretty good at Barney and kitties!
So the years went by....he grew and he grew and he grew....and drove me crazy and made me want to run away. And the next second, he'd be sitting beside me with his head on my shoulder. He brings out the strongest emotions in me. He knows exactly how to push my buttons and can make me SO freaking mad! And in the next moment, he's telling me he loves me and I'm melting.
We have the same sense of humor and can really entertain each other. We took him to the Jeff Dunham show with us and we all had a blast. I love his sarcasm. It reminds me...of me!
Everyone tells you that kids grow up so fast, and you hear it so much that it just sort of goes in one ear and out the other. But it is so very true. He is sixteen years old today and I feel like he was two years old, I blinked, and now here we are. He's driving and in the 10th grade. He's talking about getting a job. Where did the time go? I can't answer that. But I know that I am very proud of him. He is smart, caring, compassionate, and fun to be around. He also makes me want to tear my hair out.
And I'm going to show him this post, and he'll roll his eyes, but he'll give me one of those half-grins, too. And he'll tell me he loves me like he always does. Who could ask for more?
"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
as long as I'm living
my baby you'll be."
~*Happy Birthday, Tim!*~