1.25.2012

Did You Know?


Did you know that I love Holly so much, I let her name my vagina?
Did you know that she named it Vivian?
Did you know that now she wants to Va-jazzle my VaJayJay?
Did you know that I'm still trying to find a way to work into a conversation that my vagina's name is Vivian, courtesy of Holly?

Did you know that I have never ridden a jet-ski?
Did you know that last night I dreamed I was riding a jet-ski?
Did you know that it was a magical jet-ski that could also ride on land?
Did you know that while I was riding my magical land-jet-ski, panthers were trying to eat me?
Did you know that I dream up some weird shit?

Did you know that I wrong number texted my mother today?
Did you know that it could have been DISASTROUS but thank GOD it was just confusing?
Did you know that my niece once damn you auto corrected my mother?
Did you know that she typed U-Haul and it auto corrected to ubersexual?
Did you know that my 68 year old mother was MORTIFIED and TRAUMATIZED?!?!

Did you know that I promised myself I'd go to bed at 10:00 pm tonight?
Did you know that it is now 12:44 am?
Did you know that I have to work in the morning?
Did you know that I am tired and I get goofy when I'm tired?
Did you know that's why I'm posting this craziness???

Did you know that I'm seriously going to bed now? Right after I read one more blog post.........


5 comments:

Myya said...

I like you when you are tired... funnny stuff here, funny stuff!

ChiTown Girl said...

Oh my hell!!! I'm going to be SO late for work now because I got sucked into those "wrong text" sites!! Yikes, that's some funny stuff.

Amy said...

Interesting post. LOL

I absolutely hate auto correct on my phone!

Nezzy (Cow Patty Surprise) said...

Did ya know that your hilarious when your tired???

Heeeehehhee, you've made sunshine for me on this very drab and rainy day!

God bless ya and have a magnificent day!!! :o)

Not a Perfect Mom said...

I think Vivian can be brought up into any conversation...doesn't everyone like to talk about vaginas?