10.19.2008

Spiderman Returns





Dunh dunh dunh! Sounds like a cool movie. But nope, it's all about my stepson.

I'll give you just a little background. Spiderman is 9 years old. When he was 6 months old, his mom, C, took off and left him with his daddy, my husband. For years after that, C was in and out of Spiderman's life at her whim. Then when he was four, his daddy met me. C and I have had a bumpy road, but we now get along pretty well. But when I first came into the picture, she was a little jealous of my role in Spiderman's life, and started trying to be more of a mom figure. Eventually, she met a guy who seemed like a really good influence on her. She settled down, got married, and approached J about having Spiderman come to live with her. After many talks, J agreed to give it a try.


Long story short, that was two years ago, so she was definitely given a fair chance. It started out well, but she had another baby and things seem to have went downhill from there. She has a diagnosed, relatively serious mental illness, and she tries to overcome it but it's a struggle, and I do sympathize with that. Then, her husband lost his job of many years, and started drinking heavily. She tried to work, but ended up losing her job too. Her husband has had a few more jobs, but lost them as well. He's drinking up their savings, and she's not handling everything well at all. Right now, it looks like she may be taking off, leaving the baby with his (drunken, unemployed) father. When J approached her about Spiderman coming back to live with us, she had no objections. In fact, she said she really didn't have time to take care of him right now, anyway.


But thankfully, Spiderman has a stable, loving home with us waiting for him. He will be back with us, and this time permanently because we don't believe in playing ping-pong with kids. Spiderman has some special needs as well, and he needs stability even more than most kids.


While he lived with us before, he was doing so well, and progressing wonderfully. I know that now that he's coming home, we can help him continue to thrive.


We're all so excited to have him back. I know he'll be going through a lot, and I hope & pray his mom doesn't totally disappear. It may be a bumpy start because of what he's going through right now, but I know it's best for him and I'm happy to have him back in our loving, dysFUNctional home.


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34 comments:

Anonymous said...

God bless Spiderman and may he have many happy and healthy years with you guys in your home -- with C loving him enough to know he's better off with you guys but staying involved to whatever degree is good for the S-Man.

Jo-Jo said...

I am so glad you have Spiderman in your home!

Sue said...

Awh, so sweet!

Jennifer said...

Poor Spiderman--he's had a rough time of it w/ his mom. I'm glad to hear you will getting him permanently--that will be so much better for him!!

KatBouska said...

Oh how I hate dead beat moms. My heart breaks for Spiderman, but thank God he has his Dad and a family with all of you to go back to. I bet taking him back in is not as easy as you make it sound, but kudos to you for giving that boy the home he deserves!!

And thank you for freakishly stalking me. And thank you for being pretty...it's the ugly freak stalkers that really do scare me. I like you. :)

Unknown said...

What a relief that he has a loving caring family to go to....I'm so sad and scared for that baby....

Wep said...

What a good momma you are for taking in Spiderman. Poor kid.

Kat said...

Thank goodness he has you!
Welcome home, Spiderman!

Jen - Queen of Poo said...

Thank God Spiderman has your family and a place to belong. I can't imagine the hurt of having a mom that couldn't care for me as a child.

A New Yorker said...

Best of luck always.

Alison said...

he is a very lucky boy to have such a wonderful family who truly cares for him. Kudos to C for allowing him to return without any undo drama.

Mamahut said...

Yay spiderman. I can totally relate on his end of it. Thank god for awsome stepmom's out there like you.

MarĂ­a said...

Good for Spiderman - I hope it works out perfectly! :)

Aubrey said...

Such a blessing that he has such a good daddy and stepmomma like you!

Far From Perfect said...

That's a hard story to tell- we went through some similar times with Dr's grandson. His daughter has issues??? I might post this story sometime??

GypsiAdventure said...

How exciting and what a blessing to have him come back home. I know the feeling - as we are in a similar situation with my step-son.

Blessings!
~K

Anonymous said...

He has really been through a lot in his short little span huh? He is lucky to have you and your family's love..

Love the picture!!

tiarastantrums said...

sounds tough - I hope he gets more smiles over with you!!

Momisodes said...

Spiderman is fortunate to have you and your hubby in his life. May you all grow wonderful memories together as a family.

Anonymous said...

yay for the return of spiderman.

i want to comment on how honest you are in saying that you and c have had a bumpy road. i appreciate it!

my hubs has a 17 year old son from a past girlfriend. he doesnt live with us or his mom---he lives with his maternal grandmother(loooong story). even with this arrangement, there still needs to be a certain amount of civil communication on everyones part and it isnt always easy. i like my hubs. ex well enough but we really have nothing in common other than my husband. it takes work.

everyone knows how important it is to be nice to one another for the sake of the kids, but no one knows the difficulty involved unless you actually live it.

debi9kids said...

OMGosh! How wonderful for all of you, esp. Spiderman!
It will be so great for him to have the stability.
Many blessings to your family.

Anonymous said...

I love the family picture. He looks just like his dad, huh? Really Spiderman is lucky to have a great family to come home to, a lot of children under similar circumstances might not. Sounds like a sticky situation, especially for her younger child...

Aleta said...

Your positive attitude and welcoming warmth are what Spiderman needs the most. You sound like a loving family and that is what any child can ever hope for. Bless you for being open-hearted.

Kellan said...

I'm glad he is where he is loved and can be taken care of so wonderfully! He's very cute!

Take care- Kellan

Chel said...

Spidey and your husband are both blessed to have you.

Kelly said...

What a rough situation Spiderman has had...thank goodness he has you and his Dad to depend on...
Welcome back!!

♥ Becky ♥ said...

You have an awesome husband, besides you being an amazing step-mom. Not many Dads take on the real responsibility and he is doing it wonderfully. I'm so happy for spiderman that he gets to come back and live with you all.
I can only hope and pray that she doesn't leave her other child with his dad. That doesn't sound like a wise plan.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad Spiderman has a warm and loving home to be welcomed back into! I hope his mother will at least keep in touch with him. I care for two little girls whose mother ditched them 6 years ago and has never even tried to have contact with them, even though I believe she lives in the same area as us and I have looked for her. I know it is really hard for the kids to feel like their mother has rejected him.
You mentioned that Spiderman's mother also has a baby who will be staying with his father. Will Spiderman get to see the baby at all?

Little GrumpyAngel said...

Spiderman is blessed to have a family like yours who want him, love him, and welcome him with open arms. There are so many children who are less fortunate, no one to turn to. I admire you and respect you for your heart. Would I be as loving and as ready to make sacrifices if I were in your place? I very much hope so. I wish you and your family the best. As you said it might be a bumpy start, but it sounds like you have the heart to make it work.

You have a beautiful family.

Unknown said...

How wonderful that he has another mother that he can depend on. It's sad that that baby is not so lucky. Best wishes on the family addition!

Jennifer said...

you are such a good, sweet, kind and loving woman and mom. :) there should be a LOT more people in the world like you.

i hope that Spiderman bounces back okay from all this, which i'm sure with the love and support from you and your husband and family he will. :)

and I wish you all the best. even C and her husband and baby. I can't even imagine.

sometimes life is hard, but thankfully there are caring people like you to help out.

xoxoxo lots of HUGS!!!!!!

Unknown said...

I'm gonna say good for C for realizing that she can't care for Spiderman the way he needs to be cared for... THAT'S a good mom.

AND YOU are a WONDERFUL step-mom and Spiderman is VERY lucky to have you... I hope things go VERY well.

Claremont First Ward said...

Spiderman is so cute, and he's lucky to have a stable step mom in you!

Anonymous said...

Welcome home Spiderman!! Back where you belong little buddy!