4.12.2011

Stuff My Parents Say

My parents are unintentionally hilarious. My dad is 75 years old, and quite a character. He is odd. Strange. Unique. My mom is 68, and she is quirky and funny too. She is also easily embarrassed and kind of proper. As a child we were not allowed to say "Fart" or anything related to it.

So I thought I'd share a few stories of my parents with you.

  • At our new house, we have a workshop that is fully wired for electricity, climate controlled, very nice. So my dad called my husband to the side, glanced around, and quietly said, "You know what you need to watch out for? Those pot-smokers. Those pot-smokers would love to have one of their pot-parties in that workshop. So keep that thing locked so those pot-smokers don't get in!"

  • We went to a Gator baseball game last week with my parents, and I talked my Dad into buying me some popcorn. He comes back, hands me the bag, and says "You better enjoy every last piece of that popcorn because it cost me THREE DOLLARS. Three dollars for a bag of popcorn!" I offered him some, but he told me he couldn't eat popcorn that was that expensive.

  • My parents are now the primary care-takers of Ace, our chihuahua. We weren't able to bring all of our huge collection of animals to the new home, so we're now sharing custody of Ace. The other day I was talking to my Mom on the phone, and she said "I had to take one of Ace's stuffed bears away from him." I said, "Why?" and she said, "because he kept messing with him!" I honestly had no idea what she meant, so I said "What are you talking about, messing with him how?" and she said "he was acting like it was another dog!" I guess I was in la-la-land because I truly still was not getting her meaning, and I told her that, so finally she said "he was HUMPING it!!!" And I died. I got such a kick out of making my prim old mom say "humping!!" And I didn't even do it on purpose!

You have funny kids, I have funny parents, what can I say?




18 comments:

Allison Nicole said...

Funny post! They def. had me laughing!

Evonne said...

That's funny! I had a friend in college and her mom always said "marijuana cigarettes". It cracked us up every time.

diane rene said...

HAHA! I love your parents, Cyndy!!

Brandy@YDK said...

hahahha. love it. that's so funny

Shell said...

LOL So funny that your dad would even think about pot smokers!

Tara R. said...

When I do that to my mom, my husband accuses me of baiting her... it's still hilarious.

loveable_homebody said...

Parents are funny when they try to be proper. Even funnier when they react to their children being improper, or their improperness (Yes, I know: Not a word) leaks out.

Don't worry. When I was a kid, my mom didn't let me use the word fart either. She told me to say "oink" instead. Yes. Oink.

But for about ten years now, my whole family swears to make up for such travesties.

Helene said...

OMG, your parents sound like a riot! How funny that your dad was warning your hubby about pot-smokers busting into the workshop because it's climate controlled...how random is that!!!

And I love that you made your mom actually come right out and tell you the dog was humping the stuffed animal, even it was unintentional!!!

BTW, what's the name of the font that you use for your posts? I totally LOVE it!!!

shortmama said...

That is hilarious!

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

Very funny. What cute parents you have!

Sandra said...

lmao!...you're mother sounds like a darling. Now if we could get her to say the word 'fart,' we'd could have even more laughs at her expense! :)

Nezzy said...

Heeehehehe!!! All the way around girl...life is fun!

Loved the stories ya shared. :o)

Have a blessed and beautiful day!!!

Gina said...

I loved your blog today, made me think of my parents :) my dad is a wise character never know what he may say or tell joke wise ....and mom is like *i don't get it* do u know how hard it is to explain jokes to your 72 yr old mother?

Blessings
Gina

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Funny stuff! I can't believe you didn't get her hint about Ace. Thanks for the laughs.

Michelle said...

I thank you, not only for sharing about the pot smokers, but for remembering all these funnies. Too funny! Thanks!

Kimberly said...

My grandmother used to say "oBLITuaries" instead of "obituaries"

Cracked me up!

Kristin - The Goat said...

I don't think your Dad could have theater popcorn - sheesh, I've paid $7 for that stuff before.

These were truly hysterical! Thank you!

Myya said...

Those were adorable. You made me laugh. THanks! : )