10 Things of Thankful

It's time to be thankful again!

1. I am thankful that my Mama made chocolate delight for my husband's birthday dessert, because I am enjoying the leftovers right now.  Mmm-mmm, good!

2. I am thankful that my whole family and hubby's whole family got together Friday night to celebrate his birthday.  We had a great time!

3. I am thankful for one friend who is doing something fantastic for my extended family.  I will elaborate on that later.  ;-)

4. I am thankful for HOT showers.  Most days I just jump in and jump out with little thought.  But have you ever had one of those showers that just feels amazing?  The other day, I woke up sore and crampy and crabby.  I was hurting and stiff and had sheet-wrinkles all over me.  I stumbled into a hot shower and came out feeling a million times better.  Thank you, Hot Shower.

5. Thankful for Tums, because my tummy is currently not very happy about my late night snacking as mentioned in #1.

6. I am thankful for modern technology.  I ordered a frame for my dad for Fathers Day; it's a wooden frame that says We <3 Papa and then has my kids' names all over it.  It's really cool.  Anyway, yesterday at Byron's mom's house, I took a picture of my dad with my three kids and then was able to print it right there at his mom's house with her printer (I brought my own photo paper so I was only mooching her ink).  I just LOVE that we are able to do that; I was born in the 1970's so I am old enough that modern technology really amazes me.

7. I am thankful for these sweet boys.  They were very closely watching me eat breakfast.  They don't beg, they just watch.  Very intently.  And Patchy, the one in the back?  He drools.

8. I am thankful that I was able to un-clog our vacuum cleaner with a wire hanger and a lot of hard work.  Because I am Superwoman!  And this Superwoman likes a clean floor.

9. I am thankful for Summer.  It's my favorite.

10. I am thankful that I am co-hosting Medical Mondays in two days!!  Be sure and come back to visit!

Get Your Frag On

Once again, I am EXTREMELY glad that it is Friday.  Like, so glad I could kiss the calendar.

School's out for Summer.  Happy about that as well!

We had a really good time on Thursday evening.  Byron and I and all of my kids went to my parents' house for dinner.  My son's friend Nic also came along.  AND...my Mother-in-Law came!  This was her first time visiting my parents' house.  We had BBQ ribs and baked potatoes (cooked by me), yellow and zucchini squash (cooked by Shelbie), and a delicious strawberry dessert (made by my Mama).
I love how my mom and MIL hit it off so well.  They are peas in a pod.  They even like the same BIZARRE snack - a banana sandwich.  WITH MAYONNAISE.  *GAG*

Tim's friend Nic and my parents' dog, Ace

I haven't been thrifting in FOREVER and we're planning on going tomorrow.  YAY!
Then I get to see my Hayleigh-girl, and Byron and my Dad are planning on going fishing.
That should be....interesting.

OK, sorry for the short frags but I'm dozing off and having dreams of monkeys in hospital beds.  I'm not even kidding.

Have a great weekend!

My Little Man

Last week was eventful at the Land of Dysfunction, and I'm going to be blogging all about it this week. So stay tuned.

Today I'm going to talk about my son's birthday.
My son turned 19 on Friday.
I was 19 when I gave birth to him.
So, it's kind of a big one.
March 30th, 1993 changed my life forever. I became a mother. There's really nothing bigger in life than that, at least for me.
For 2 years and 9 months, Tim was my one and only. He will always be my only boy, my little man. Right now he is the main man in my life. He's the one I call when I need something. Sure I still have my dad, and friends. But he's my Main Man.
When he was a baby & toddler, his dad worked a lot and drove a race car on the weekends. So much of the time, it was just the two of us. He was my whole world, my life revolved around him. It created a bond that will never be broken.
I'm very glad that he is not becoming a father at 19 (thus far, crossing fingers, lol). He may not be exactly where he wants to be in life right now, but he'll get there.
He drives me crazy, but I love him deeply.
He used to say "Mommy, I love you all your heart", which he derived from me saying "I love you with all my heart". How cute is that? 19 or not, he will always be my baby.

Can someone please tell me how I have a 19 year old child????

Southern Daddies

"Honey, you know a lot about a lot, but you don't know shit about Southern daddies and their Southern daughters." - Straw Dogs

I watched that movie last week, and that one line really struck a chord in me. I've been thinking about it a lot ever since.

My Southern daddy taught me a lot of things.

He taught me some things hands-on.

My daddy taught me how to fish.

He taught me how to shoot a gun.

He taught me how to plant a garden.

He taught me some things by telling me.

He told me that I could be anything I wanted to be.

He told me that it's just as easy to love a rich man as a poor man. (I never did listen.....)

He told me to stand up for myself and not to let people walk all over me.

He taught me some things by his actions.

He taught me to never let a man treat me the way he treated my mama.

He taught me never to work a job that I hate and make my family miserable.

He taught me to not let my depression go undiagnosed & untreated....and make my family miserable.

He taught me to tell people that I love them - and show them - before it's too late and you are brought to your knees by grief and regret.

My Daddy is NOT a redneck. I've never really known how to describe my dad. He was raised on a farm in the country in the South. But he does not fit the redneck stereotype at all. He is always well-dressed and well-groomed. He doesn't drive a big truck or chew tobacco or fly a rebel flag.

Recently, my niece's husband was teasing my dad and calling him a redneck. My dad was not amused.

"I am not a redneck."

"Well what are you then?"

"I am a Southern Gentleman."

Good answer, Daddy.

And your daughter is a Hot Southern Mess.

{This was supposed to have been a scheduled post on Wednesday for PYHO, but obviously, I screwed up. I'm still linking up with Shell - go visit her for wonderful Pour Your Heart Out posts!}

Who are these people and what have they done with my parents?

Let me tell you a little something about my childhood.

My parents were NOT animal people. I have no idea how I became such an animal lover. My parents were the type who had to be begged and pleaded with in order to get a pet, and then it had to live outside. Now, they did take good care of any pets we did have, but they were NOT members of the family. They were animals.

Once they both retired, I tried to talk them into getting a small dog to keep them company, but they had absolutely no interest in that.

Now. When we moved into our current home, we were not able to bring all of our dogs with us, so Shelbie's chihuahua, Ace, went to live with my parents. I knew they would take good care of him, but I worried that he would not be loved the way Shelbie loved him.

Ha.ha.ha.ha. Oh, the irony.

My parents have fallen in love. Both of them. Ace runs their house. He is the center of their attention. Their entire world revolves around Ace.

My mom has bought Ace clothes, jackets, and most recently, a Snuggie. She enjoys texting me pictures of Ace in his fancy outfits.

Over Thanksgiving, I dog-sat Ace. My mother brought over a reusable shopping bag full of Ace's toys, treats, and food. She brought his bed and his blanket, as well as his food dishes, because apparently he can't go even a few days using regular bowls. Heaven Forbid!

My mom lectured me at length about how to properly care for him, and my dad informed of the times of day that Ace poops. I was told when to give him treats and when to put him to bed.

I am not freaking kidding.

But I think the best thing of all happened today. I received the following text from my mother:

REMINDER: Ace's Birthday is on Sunday!!

They are 100% wrapped around Ace's little paw.

DysFUNctional MOMents

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Andrew's birthday is coming up next week, and we're having his party at a nearby park.

It's going to be great because he can run around, act crazy, and have a good time.

The weather is still great here in Florida, so we don't have to worry about that.

So, why, you may be asking, is this a DysFUNctional MOMent?
Because I picked this location for one reason, and one reason only.

So that I don't have to clean up after everybody.

No pre-party clean up. No post-party cleanup.

That is called winning.

Link up to your DysFUNctional MOMent post, and please, leave a comment!

Stuff My Parents Say

My parents are unintentionally hilarious. My dad is 75 years old, and quite a character. He is odd. Strange. Unique. My mom is 68, and she is quirky and funny too. She is also easily embarrassed and kind of proper. As a child we were not allowed to say "Fart" or anything related to it.

So I thought I'd share a few stories of my parents with you.

• At our new house, we have a workshop that is fully wired for electricity, climate controlled, very nice. So my dad called my husband to the side, glanced around, and quietly said, "You know what you need to watch out for? Those pot-smokers. Those pot-smokers would love to have one of their pot-parties in that workshop. So keep that thing locked so those pot-smokers don't get in!"
• 
  
• We went to a Gator baseball game last week with my parents, and I talked my Dad into buying me some popcorn. He comes back, hands me the bag, and says "You better enjoy every last piece of that popcorn because it cost me THREE DOLLARS. Three dollars for a bag of popcorn!" I offered him some, but he told me he couldn't eat popcorn that was that expensive.
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• My parents are now the primary care-takers of Ace, our chihuahua. We weren't able to bring all of our huge collection of animals to the new home, so we're now sharing custody of Ace. The other day I was talking to my Mom on the phone, and she said "I had to take one of Ace's stuffed bears away from him." I said, "Why?" and she said, "because he kept messing with him!" I honestly had no idea what she meant, so I said "What are you talking about, messing with him how?" and she said "he was acting like it was another dog!" I guess I was in la-la-land because I truly still was not getting her meaning, and I told her that, so finally she said "he was HUMPING it!!!" And I died. I got such a kick out of making my prim old mom say "humping!!" And I didn't even do it on purpose!

You have funny kids, I have funny parents, what can I say?