2.15.2010

End of Innocence

We've been so busy that my Weekend WrapUp will have to be postponed until tomorrow - but it's a good one, it was a wonderful weekend! So be sure and check back in!
Instead I bring you this, with a warning not to let little ones read over your shoulder....it's not X-rated (sorry to disappoint), just innocence-ending. *sniff*



The inevitable happened last week.
Elayna lost a baby tooth, and put it in a bag for the tooth fairy, along with a totally adorable note.
A note that the tooth fairy was required to reply to.
I don't know if I didn't disguise my handwriting well enough, if she maybe wasn't completely asleep when I went in....but the next day, she said to me:
"Mommy, is the tooth fairy real?"
My heart dropped to my feet.
She is my baby, and every milestone step of hers is hard for me. It wouldn't matter if I had twelve more babies, it would be hard for me to watch them grow up.
I tried giving her non-answers "what do you think?"
But she was persistent. She was serious. She wanted straight answers.
So I told her. I told her that the tooth fairy is not real, that I am the one who puts money under her pillow.
I probably should've anticipated the next question, but I didn't.
"What about Santa?"
Sigh.
"No Elayna, Santa's not real either."
"So you and John buy presents and put them under the tree and write FROM SANTA on them?"
"Yep, that's exactly what we do."
I can't even explain how heavy my heart was when we had this talk, or how heavy it is now. I knew it was inevitable, she is nine years old after all. Some of her friends stopped believing years ago, and she knew that. My older kids never asked; they just gradually stopped believing but kept up the act for the sake of the little ones.
But Elayna....she is SO much like me. I very distinctly remember cornering my parents and demanding the truth, just like she did. My dad tried the non-answering like I did, but they finally spilled the beans. And Christmas lost much of its magic for me right then.
I guess that's one reason that it makes me so sad. It's hard to see her grow up and lose the sweet, innocent beliefs of a young child. And realize that the world is not quite as amazing and magical and fantastical as she once believed that it was.

16 comments:

Erin said...

Awww I don't even want to think about that time. I am hoping that between now and then maybe Santa will become "real"!!

And you WON my giveaway!! So send me an email with all your info and I will make sure to get you your Daisy set!

C said...

awwwwwwww so sad.... i know, we went through it here too.

life.

sometimes it just sucks.


c

Cheryl said...

I know what your saying. I went thru the same thing a couple years back and ended up doing what you did. I sure upset me more then my daughter but I am like you, I think it made things less magical after that.

Susan said...

That is so sad. I'm going to cry when my Bella turns one in May. It breaks your heart to see them grow up so fast. *hugs*

cat said...

Oh this is super sad! I will go to great lengths to try and keep up the magic.

Confessions From A Working Mom said...

Ohhhhhh my heart breaks for you having to tell her that! I think you should always tell kids the truth when they ask a pointed question like that... but I wish there was a way you'd been able to lie without KNOWING you'd lied. Does that make sense?

~Elizabeth
Confessions From A Working Mom

4 Lettre Words said...

Awww....I dread the day....

Kat said...

Ahhh. That is a sad day, indeed. I am dreading that day. My mom always said when the last child (me) found out it ended the fun for them too. :(

Shannon said...

My kids are 7 and 9... and still believe in Santa and the TF. I'm waiting for the day when one of them asks...

LceeL said...

Well, obviously, the answer is to have another baby. Right?

shortmama said...

Im dreading that day when my oldest discovers the truth too. She was already asking questions this past Christmas and I thought for sure she was going to figure it out....but we made it through. Not sure she will make it this year though...so sad!

Tara R. said...

That is always such a difficult realization for kids, and equally as hard on the parents. Sounds like you handled it well. I hope Elayna accepted your explanation.

Helene said...

Oh no! I can only imagine how tough that was. I know I'll have to go through the same conversation with my kids in a few more years and I'm dreading it!

Just Breathe said...

How did she handle your answers? Did she seem sad?
I do know that it never left any ill effects with me, my parents always gave us a fantastic Christmas. I think that I need to ask my own kids how it effected them, I don't remember them asking me :( (My poor memory) See you will always have this post to look back on, I think that is so awesome.

Twisted Fencepost said...

I can totally relate to this. My youngest is 13 and this year I was for sure that he had lost the magic of believing. But then he says something that makes me not quite so possitive. I am trying to keep the magic of childhood alive as long as possible. But I feel I'm losing my grip. I'm hoping I can keep it alive in other ways. I just have to be more creative.

Jenners said...

Awwww...so sad. I dread this day myself. But I actually don't remember being traumatized by it myself so maybe my son won't be.