- A pharmacist tells a customer, 'In order to buy arsenic you need a legal prescription. A picture of your mother-in-law just isn't enough.'
- My mother-in-law is banned internationally from playing poker, as she keeps all the chips on her shoulder.
- Adam and Eve were the happiest, and the luckiest, couple in the world, because neither of them had a mother-in-law.
- What is the difference between outlaws and in-laws? Outlaws are Wanted.
- Fred and Rick were in a pub. Fred says to his mate, 'My mother-in-law is an angel.' Rick replies, 'You're lucky. Mine is still alive.'
"....and that's all I have to say about that." - Forrest Gump