8.25.2010

Andrew's Nightmare

(if you don't know anything about Andrew, you may want to read back some. This is the most recent post and a good starting point.)

A while back, shortly after Andrew's mom flaked out and he came back to live with us, my Mother-in-Law and Andrew were shopping and they ran into Andrew's Mom, Christina. They turned a corner and there she was, in the middle of the next aisle, unavoidable. She was so caught up in her own (self-induced) drama at that time that all she did was ramble about her life, and MIL was able to cut it short and then she and Andrew immediately left the store.
Fast forward to last week. MIL and Andrew were together and she drove up to that same store, not thinking anything of it; she shops there frequently.
But as she was getting out of her car, MIL looked over at Andrew and saw that his eyes were welled up with tears. She asked him what was wrong, and he began to cry.
"Last night, I had the worst nightmare of my life," he told her.
"I dreamt you made me go back to Christina!" He was sobbing by this time, so upset just from remembering this dream. He had dreamt that MIL (John's mom, Andrew's grandmother) had taken him back to Christina and forced him to live with her. He begged her to never do that to him, and she of course reassured him that she wouldn't.
I just can't imagine what Christina did that made him feel this way, this strongly, about her. It's very unusual, even in abuse situations, for a child to adamantly state that they never want to see their mother again, and continue to say that (to anyone who will listen) for over two years.
It just makes me more determined than ever that she will never have the chance to do it again.



For more Pour Your Heart Out posts, visit Shell @ Things I Can't Say.

31 comments:

heather@actingbalanced.com said...

my heart bleeds for this little guy - to have to live with the pain of what a selfish and irresponsible adult did to him is unthinkable - so glad he's with you and loved :)

Erin said...

That poor thing! I hope he never has to see her again either! But with you in his corner, he's all set!!!

Myya said...

It sure is a good thing that this sweet little guy has a Mom like you to make sure that he is safe & where he belongs!!!

C said...

awwww cindy, maybe you guys should think about getting him in therapy... he needs help with his pain. having you guys for his parents is the best thing, but this sounds bigger to me than what a parent can do.... i'm so sorry... poor lil guy.

Kirby3131 said...

He has been blessed to have you, that's for sure. Blessed.

Kristin - The Goat

He & Me + 3 said...

How very sad for him. I hope that you are able to figure it out. He sounds very safe and happy with you all. What a sweet sensitive boy you have there...handsome too.

Amanda said...

Cindy, this crushes my heart. Poor little guy :( Thank God he's out of whatever situation he came from.

Shell said...

Thank God he has somewhere else to be and feel safe and loved.

Thanks for linking up!

brainella said...

He's so lucky he has you to love and protect him.

diane rene said...

OMgosh my heart hurts for him. I worked with abused and neglected children for years and you're right, she must have done something horrible for him to feel this way.

or ... he is just a way super mature little boy who knows he is loved by you and that is why he doesn't want to go back. yeah, I feel better with that in my head :)

April said...

This just breaks my heart, but Andrew is beyond blessed to have you in his life...and I feel certain he'd say the same about you!

Brandy@YDK said...

poor guy - it's great he has you to look out for him.

kristi said...

Bless his heart. That must have been so scary for him to see her.

Lindsay-ann said...

I am so sorry to hear Andrew was distressed. He is so lucky to have you to love him and care for him.
Lindsay
x

Melani said...

That poor kid! I am so happy for him that you are his momma...that really is just too bad she has ruined him and he wants nothing to do with her...

Debby said...

I can't imagine growing up with such pain at such a young age. I will keep him in my prayers.
Here is a HUG for you. ((HUG))

Dina @ 4 Lettre Words said...

Breaks my heart. Saying a prayer for all parties now...

Tonjia said...

I am so sad that this little boy has had to go through this in his short life. The good thing, though, is that he is able to express his feelings now. I think that means he feels comfortable and protected with his life right now.

please give him a hug for me.

shortmama said...

Poor kid. Im so glad he has you guys to be with instead!

Kel said...

That's horrible, poor little guy. I hope and pray she will never hurt him again. So sad ...
~K

Mrs.Mayhem said...

Reading this post breaks my heart, especially the photograph with that sweet little face. I'm so glad you are doing everything you can to protect him, and providing a stable, happy home for him.

Helene said...

Oh this just breaks my heart...poor little guy. He is so blessed to have someone as loving and caring as you in his life. What a sweet little man he is.

Tammie said...

poor andrew. i hope with time all of those bad memories will fade.

Honey Mommy said...

Poor guy! So lucky that he has you guys now!

sitting on the mood swing at the playground said...

Poor little guy. I'm glad he has you AND the reassurance that he won't go back to Christina.

sitting on the mood swing at the playground said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
From Tracie said...

So sad. I'm glad that he has found an advocate and a safe place to live.

Eternal Lizdom said...

This boy is so blessed to have a dad who loves him and you for a mom to love and protect him. I went and read the post you linked to and my heart breaks for him. He definitely needs to feel secure in his place and security in his home.

Eternal Lizdom said...

I wonder if there isn't some thing you could do that would help with that? Like an at home ceremony that bonds you all together and vows protection or something? A blessing, a time capsule, an engraved stone by a fave spot in the yard?

Karen & Gerard Zemek said...

Andrew is fortunate to be a part of your family now and hopefully if the courts are involved, the judge will certainly see that he is terrified of Christina and would never give her custody again.

Stopping by from Saturday Samplings.

Mrs4444 said...

I'm so glad Andrew lives with you guys. Poor kid. Saying a prayer for that little guy tonight...