Right Where I Need to Be

I fed a sweet old man lunch and dinner today.

He's not able to feed himself. So I fed him.
When I left my home care job, I was so afraid that I was leaving my calling.
The work that I feel led to do.  The work for which I feel passion.
As I rushed around from room to room today, taking care of the needs of a dozen patients, I didn't feel that way.
I scurried back and forth, trying to make sure each patient was being taken care of, answering call lights, taking vitals, among what seemed like a million other things, and hoping I was doing well on my second day at this job.
When we finally had a moment to breathe, the senior tech who is training me said, "I want to tell you something.  We have had a TOUGH group [of patients] today.  This has been a very busy and hard day.  And you have done an excellent job.  These patients have received far better care than they would have if you were not with me today.  And if you can handle this group on this day - you can handle anything."

I fed a sweet old man lunch and dinner today.


Quick Frags

~~ Quick Frags!!  I actually prepared most of this post earlier in the week but didn't have time to actually POST it!

~~ Life is good - those of you who care about me and know about my life, just know that I am as happy as I could possibly be at this point! =)

~~ I posted earlier this week about my Instagram addiction.  Later that same day I snapped my favorite Instagram pic yet, so of course I HAD to share it with you.  I was at an auto shop and saw a very big dragonfly on the wall.

Pre-Instagram, the camera washed out the color and it looked like...a bug on a wall.

After Instagram.....

~~This is my new favorite song.  The singer & co-writer is 24 years old and has absolutely knocked my socks off.  She is AMAZING!

~~ As always check out Half Past Kissin Time for more Friday Fragments! & Have a wonderful weekend!

Mommy's Idea



I recently read a blog post that has really been weighing heavily on my mind.
It was about 'not having time' for the people in your life.
And 'being too busy' for your friends and loved ones.
And what that boils down to is really a matter of priorities.
We make time for the things that we consider to be important.
I don't mean every day.  But if someone is important enough for you - you WILL find time in your life for that person.
And when you keep reaching out to someone who continually shuts you out - because they are too busy or don't have time - you have to finally accept the fact that you are simply NOT a priority to that person.  No matter how much you love them.  No matter that you would drop anything to be there if they needed you.
And it hurts.
But there comes a time when you just stop.  You stop making offers because you know they will be rejected.  You stop making plans because you know they will be cancelled.  You accept that you will just be a bystander, standing at the outskirts of their lives.  Watching and occasionally allowed in but not truly a part of it.  Because you are NOT a priority.
You don't have to like it, but you do have to accept it.
It is what it is.  Concentrate on YOUR priorities.  And move on........


Instagram - My Latest Addiction

I got a (kick-ass) new phone last week and one of the first things I did was download Instagram.  I've been seeing Instagram pics all over Facebook for ages but my old phone didn't have the space available for it.
But now I do.
And of course - I am hooked.
So, I'll be sharing some pics here, with you!  YAY!

Elayna's learning to shoot a bow.  Note the pink arrow.  ;-)

Getting her nails done...before they're trimmed down.

Steak & Shake

Shelbie hated this picture but I love it!  She's driving a big ole' Ford F150 Truck and SINGING!  

And of course we had to do the "claws" shot for her too. 

Yep.  I'm addicted!!
ETA - I'm such a newbie I didn't think to give you my Instagram name  - it's @cyndy_n  


Big Changes a'Coming

A few Mondays ago, I wrote a blog post all about my job.  I told you what I do for a living, how much I love it, and how rewarding it is.
What I did not - could not - tell you, is that I am leaving this job.

I couldn't tell you because it wasn't certain yet.  I was waiting on the official offer from the new job - I had to pass a background check, health screening, drug test, etc...........

I am, obviously, not leaving because I am dissatisfied with the work itself in any way.  I love my client and her family.  I also adore my employers and they have been wonderful to me for the past year.  They've went above and beyond for me, and I appreciate them greatly.

The pay is very, very low.  And because of the current economy, it's not going to get much better.  I did just get my annual raise - but it's still nowhere near enough.

I was looking for another job in addition to my home care job to supplement my income, and I applied as a Nurse Tech at a local hospital - essentially the same thing I did for four years at another local hospital.  The position I applied for was PRN - as needed.  They would just call me when they were short-handed.
But when I got there and interviewed, they ended up asking if I would consider working for them full time.
(seriously the best interview I EVER had. It was a blast.)

The pay is better and the benefits are great - health insurance, retirement, the whole bit.  I literally CAN'T pass up this opportunity - it's just not an option.

I will stay on at my current job on PRN status, and hopefully they will use me often; I really want to keep in contact with my client and her wonderful family.
I have already told my employers, but I haven't yet told my client nor her family; I haven't worked for her since officially being hired at the hospital.  I'll tell her on Monday.  I am SO not looking forward to that conversation.  Additionally, one of the long-term night shifters recently left (for a higher paying job - of course) so it's yet another loss for her.  It sucks.  I know she'll understand, but I still feel badly for leaving her. Quality care is so hard to come by.

I'm VERY excited, don't get me wrong.  When I toured the unit after my interview, I couldn't help but get excited about being back in the hospital atmosphere.  I do miss it.  I also miss wearing CUTE scrubs - right now I only wear company scrubs in blue & khaki.  Boring! LOL

And best of all, I have a plan.  This job will, eventually, take me back to doing home care, but in a different setting.  For a long time, I have felt a calling to do Hospice care.  My plan is to go back to school for nursing (this job offers 100% TUITION REIMBURSEMENT - HELLOOO!!!!!) and eventually be a Hospice Nurse.  Now, I have had some false starts on this path before, but current life circumstances make this more of a possibility now than ever before.  So, hopefully, this time I will achieve my goals.

But - I have never, ever left a job that I LOVED.  So, there's a sense of loss, a sadness, a bittersweet feeling.

So.  One more week with my sweet client, then it's on to bigger and better things as of Monday October 29th.  Thank you all for coming along with me on this journey!


Late Night Fraggin'

Mommy's Idea 

Better late than never.....right?

 ~ My daughter and her boyfriend made Reese's Brownie Cookie cups last night for dessert.  YUMMM!!

~ Yes - Shelbie has a boyfriend.  She's dated before but this is really her first REAL relationship.  And?  He is the son of one of my best friends.  I've known him since he was in his mama's belly.  So of course, I'm happy.

~ The girls and I got pampered today - nails for them and a pedicure for me.  Very nice!

~ I have some big, good, and exciting changes coming in my near future.  But, they warrant their own post, so keep an eye out next week!  (haha, it's a cliffhanger!)

~ Anxiety update: I have a handle on it and feel MUCH better.

Have a great weekend - I KNOW that we will!!!  =D


Sophie. Rhymes with TROPHY.

I have some wonderful bloggy friends who know me TOO well.  One of them shared this on my Facebook wall yesterday, and I knew immediately it was going on the blog.

If you've ever seen Toddlers & Tiaras, you will appreciate this.  It's HILARIOUS and totally worth watching until the surprise ending.

Enjoy -  and thanks Amy!


Cut the Crap!

I've been having an issue with Google reader for a long time now. 
Once I subscribe to a blog, I'm stuck with it forever.
I unsubscribe, delete, whatever it lets me do, and it goes away. 
Until they post again.  Then BAM! right back in my reader.
It's really annoying.  Not because it's incredibly difficult to just not read the blogs I don't care to read, but because it clutters my reader and I have to pick through which ones I do want to read vs. the ones I don't.  Also it's not always easy to remember by title alone which blogs I really enjoy.  So, the blogs I want to read get lost in the sea of blogs I don't want to read.  And there are quite a few of those.

For the most part it's just annoying stuff.  Either the blog took a turn that just doesn't interest me, or it's about something that used to interest me but not any more (for example, I was on a big couponing kick a while back and have since lost time and interest).  Or it's a partial feed....I LOATHE partial feeds.  
First world problems, I know, I know. 

But a recent post made me realize that I have to fix this feed situation, once and for all.

Someone posted a photo of her kid's poop.  

I don't mean dog poop, baby's poop or even a toddler's potty training first poo in the toilet.  (I don't want to see any of that either, for the record).  But no - I mean a school-aged child's giant shit floating in the toilet.

I do not now nor will I ever want to see a picture of shit on the internet.  
It's a deal-breaker, friends.
I have since found a new reader service and am in the process of transferring all of my subscriptions - the ones I WANT to read.  If you post shit - you won't make the cut. 

(and if the offending Poop Poster is reading this - I am NOT sorry.  Just be glad I didn't call you out and link to you. Because really?  EW.)


Bag of STUFF

I don't know about you but I like to carry stuff with me everywhere I go.  I always worry that I'll need something when I'm away from home and won't have it.  So anything remotely portable is coming with me everywhere I go.

Also, I frequently work long shifts and I like to pack plenty of snacks and things to occupy me during that time.

All of this requires something to carry my stuff around!  I love bags, especially BIG bags that I can fill up with  all of the necessities of life!

So when I was contacted recently by Simply Bags, I was excited to check them out.

I chose an orange bag with my name embroidered in blue (because Go Gators, that's why!). They even spelled my name right!  BONUS POINTS!

It was exactly what I wanted & pictured!  Bright and colorful, and big and roomy enough for all of my STUFF.  I can fill it with snacks, books, even my netbook.  Perfect work bag or just general STUFF bag!  

My Gators won last night too!  WOOT WOOT!

Simply Bags has many other types of bags; lunch bags, cosmetic bags, all different sizes and patterns and even bags for men!   Go check 'em out!

I was not paid for this post.  I received the product free of charge from Simply Bags to review and introduce to my readers, but the opinions stated are real and my own!


I Believe....II

I did another "I Believe" post over three years ago.  I went back and read it and was pleased to see that what I Believe hasn't changed much.  But I remember I enjoyed doing it back then and wanted to do another one.

I Believe that almost anything looks better if it's PURPLE.

I Believe this:

I Believe that tomorrow will be a better day.

I Believe that a meal tastes better when shared with family or friends.

I Believe in Seeking Joy.

I Believe that partial feeds, word verification, and no-reply commenters are from the DEVIL.  Ok not really the no-reply commenters because I think many of you don't know or don't know how to fix it but OMG.  It really makes me cray-cray!!

I Believe this:

I Believe that MTV's Teen Mom did NOT glamourize teen pregnancy.  I'm pretty sure that nobody who holds that opinion has actually watched the show.  Did you see Amber Behind Bars?  Folks, that is NOT glamour. Not.Even.Close.

I Believe in marriage.  And keepin' on tryin' till ya get it right! (that's a shout-out to two of my dear friends who are planning their 4th weddings.  Not sure if that makes them determined, persistent, or insane....but I love 'em!)

Inspired by this post which was inspired by another post and on & on like that.....you know how it goes.


Dating When You're Old As Dirt

Dating in your 30's is very different than dating when you're young.

When you're young, the way to your heart tends to be fancy dinners, flowers, chocolate, or taking you somewhere really cool.

Let me tell you the way to my heart, dating in my 30's.  (hey! I am only 39, I can still say I'm in my 30's thankyouverymuch!)

~~ bring me a cold Diet Dr Pepper because I told him one time it's my favorite and he was actually LISTENING and remembered.
(I'm SO low-maintenance. This was better than diamonds - just because of the thought behind it.)

~~ buying mac & cheese for Elayna because he remembered us talking one time about how it's her FAVORITE thing in the world.

~~ walking by the watermelon in the supermarket and dragging me back to get some for Shelbie because he remembered us talking one time about how it's her FAVORITE thing in the world.

~~ mowing my lawn while I'm at work, without being asked, because it was almost knee-high and I don't have a mower and I'm working and trying to balance everything and hellooo, I'm a girl.

~~ telling my son that he doesn't have to worry about his Mama, because he will take care of me.  Awwwww!

~~ The only thing that makes a hard day better is knowing he'll be there at the end of the day.  He will tell me everything will be okay.  He will be lying, because it won't be okay, not right now - but eventually it will.  And if he could take all that pain away, he would, in a heartbeat.


Complimentary Listicles

Today's Listicles topic is 10 Compliments. One of the things I love about the Listicles is that you can kind of do whatever you want within the topic.  I decided to split it into two lists - 5 compliments I love to RECEIVE, and 5 compliments I love to GIVE.

Years ago I had a co-worker who made my day on a regular basis.  She was so free with her compliments; when she noticed something, she said it.  "That color looks great on you, your hair looks so good today..." etc.  I noticed that she was so well-liked and people were just drawn to her, because she made people feel good.  Since then I try to be more free with MY compliments.  Especially with my kids, because I think they are big self-esteem boosters.Like....


1. You did a GREAT JOB with _______.
2. I love the way you did _______.  I try but mine never turns out as well as yours!
3. Can you help me with _____? You are so much better at it than I am!
4. You are so good at _____. 
5. This food is delicious!  Can I get the recipe?

I used to be really bad about taking compliments.  I always tried to combat it with something negative...it was weird. When I realized what I was doing, I made myself stop.  Now, I just say THANK YOU and force myself to shut up! lol


1. You can't possibly be 39, I thought you were about 25!
2. Your house smells SO good.  (I have a thing about my house smelling realllly good! Tarts/candles/plug-ins are always in use!)
3. Thank you for being such a great caregiver.
4. Any compliment or thank you coming from my kids....of course.
5. This food is delicious!  Can I get the recipe?

How about you?  Compliments - do you give them? Can you take them? 


Hard Times

So many people I know are going through hard times right now.
In fact, as I read blogs and my friends' Facebook posts, I'm struck by how hard of a year this has been for SO many people. 

One of my friends who was particularly hard hit is Chris.  Besides personal problems, she's had serious health problems which have led to career problems which of course have led to financial problems.  

You can read more about her story at her blog, No Drama for da Mama.

If you are willing and able to help Chris out - go here.

I sure hope 2013 is a better year - for all of us!


Spicing Up Halloween

Last year was the first year I've ever dressed up in a "sexy" Halloween Costume.

My long-time readers will remember that I had weight loss surgery (almost FIVE years ago!) and prior to that, there was no way I would attempt to dress sexy.  I didn't plan on it last year, but I stumbled upon a costume and decided to go for it.
I loved it.  It was a blast and a huge ego-boost.

I'm not exactly sure what the costume actually IS.
I got it for a couple of bucks at a thrift store.
Scottish Terrier herder, maybe?
Nobody seemed to care.
Anyway.  Now that October is here, it's time to start making plans for Halloween again.  This time I decided to see what Eden Fantasys had to offer.  If you're going to go sexy, might as well go all out, right?!

They have some super-hot Halloween Costumes available.  I must admit I think this School Girl costume is really cute, but I do NOT show my stomach.  No way, nevah!

Darque School Girl - Costume

Being in the health care field, this Nurse costume is really appealing to me.  I think it would be a LOT of fun!  ;-)
Nurse Juana B. Sedated - Costume
I just wish the Boobs came with the costume.

So what about you?  What are your Halloween Costume plans?  Will you dress up?  If so, will it be cute, sexy, silly, scary, or something else altogether?
You can save 20% site-wide at Eden Fantasys with the coupon code PLAY20!

Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store



I had the privilege of babysitting this little doll last week.

Hayleigh.....7 months old

If you can look at this picture and NOT smile, 
I'm pretty sure you have no soul. 
You might be a zombie.
You should probably get yourself checked.

Visit these lovely ladies for more Wordful Wednesday posts!

parenting BY dummies


Medical Monday Blog Hop

I'm not usually much of a hopper, but I just couldn't resist this one.
I recently started reading Your Doctor's Wife.  It's a great blog and her header is one of the coolest I have EVER seen.  For real.

Anyway, I couldn't resist this blog hop because it's a Medical Monday hop.  Not only I am in the health care profession, but today makes one year that I've been caring for my main client.
I absolutely love what I do.  If you're new here, I do home health care. I'm a CNA - Certified Nursing Assistant.  I work for an agency but since I started, have had one main client.

The type of work I do is very hands on.  Very personal.  I help my clients with any aspect of their daily lives that they need help with.  Some of the things I help with are dressing, taking medications, and going to appointments.  I cook their meals.  I see them at their worst and their best.
My main client gets 24 hour care.  She can do very little for herself.  I help her with any and everything.  I have met all of her children and most of her grandchildren.  I have bonded with my client and her family.  I spend so much time at her home, it's like a second home to me.

Sidenote: All of my clients thus far have been continent (meaning they need little to no help using the restroom).  This has been a blessing.  I can and will do whatever I need to do, but I won't lie and say I'm not glad that I don't have to deal with a lot of....ummmm....waste products!

My philosophy is that I treat my clients the way I would want my parents to be treated.  I am respectful and caring and warm.  I do my best to help them maintain their dignity in a time where that can be a challenge.  I speak to them with kindness, never talking down to them.  I don't give orders, I make requests.  I ask their opinion instead of making choices for them regarding things like meals and clothing.  I wouldn't work in an environment where other caregivers did not treat their clients respectfully; I simply couldn't tolerate it.

I have loved senior citizens for as long as I can remember.  I first felt called to do this type of work several years ago.  Two years ago I finally took the plunge and did it.  And I love it.  I've never had a job that I loved this much, that was this rewarding and fulfilling.  I feel appreciated and valued.  I don't dread going to work.  I think I've only missed work once this entire year and it was totally inevitable (and with the insanity I've been through this year, that's saying a LOT).  This agency has been good to me and I appreciate them.  When I first started, along with my main client I also cared for the company owner's grandmother until she passed away.  I adored her and every time I left, she told me she loved me and gave me a hug.  I miss her dearly.

It's a unique job.  It has its challenges but the rewards are great.
I've worked in health care for over six years now and I can't imagine doing anything else, although I do plan to advance in this field.  (I worked as a tech in a hospital for four years and did home health care independently for a year after that.)
I am not certain what the future holds; I have goals, hopes and dreams. But I know the health care field is where my heart is, and where I'll always be!